Essential to Prevent Burnout – Prioritise Yourself!
You’ve likely heard it before, especially during the safety briefing on a plane: “Put your own oxygen mask on before helping others.” It makes perfect sense in that context, doesn’t it? If you’re gasping for air, you can’t be of help to anyone else. So why do we forget this rule when it comes to our daily lives?
As professional women, we’re often expected to juggle multiple responsibilities: career, family, friendships, and personal obligations—all while striving to excel in each role. At work, we aim to over-deliver, hoping to prove we deserve our place at the table. At home, we want to be fully present for our children, making sure they don’t feel neglected due to our busy schedules. We want to be loving partners, caring daughters to our parents and in-laws, and attentive friends. The list is endless.
How does it all feel when you lay it out like that? Exhausting, isn’t it? It’s no wonder so many of us feel drained, overwhelmed, and constantly in search of some elusive work-life balance. The hard truth is: you can’t pour from an empty cup.
It’s time to start prioritising yourself.
Why Prioritising Yourself Matters
It might feel counterintuitive, especially when you are surrounded by people who rely on you, but prioritising your well-being is essential to preventing burnout. When you take care of yourself, you’re more equipped to handle stress, stay focused, and be fully present in your various roles. Running on empty affects not only you, but also the people who depend on you—your family, your colleagues, your friends. They benefit when you are at your best, and they suffer when you are not.
Let’s face it: you are the cornerstone of many people’s lives. A good work-life balance for you benefits everyone around you. But if you are worn out and depleted, you are not really helping anyone—not effectively anyway. That’s why helping yourself first isn’t selfish; it’s the foundation for everything else. You are only as strong for others as you are for yourself.
The Consequences of Ignoring Your Own Needs
Ignoring your needs doesn’t make you a better mother, wife, boss, employee, or friend. In fact, it can make you irritable, less effective, and more prone to burnout.
Chronic stress can lead to more than just exhaustion. It can manifest in various ways: anxiety, depression, physical health issues, and even strained relationships. We push ourselves to the point where we feel like we’re failing in every role, despite giving everything we have. This is the vicious cycle many women face daily.
But here’s the thing: you don’t have to live this way.
How to Prioritise Yourself
Prioritising yourself is about creating habits and practices that protect your energy and nurture your well-being. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but it’s crucial for restoring joy and fulfilment in your work, family and social life.
- Set Boundaries
You can’t do everything, and that’s okay. Saying “no” is one of the most powerful ways to protect yourself against burnout. Boundaries are not walls; they are guidelines that help you manage your mental, emotional, and physical health. Identify the activities and commitments that drain you the most, and either limit or eliminate them.
For instance, if certain work tasks or social obligations consistently leave you feeling drained, it’s time to re-evaluate their importance. Delegate more at work, scale back on non-essential meetings, or simply say “no” to events you don’t truly want to attend. Boundaries are about understanding that your time and energy are finite, and you deserve to protect them.
- Schedule ‘Me Time’
We schedule meetings, deadlines, and social events, but often forget to carve out time for ourselves. This is a recipe for burnout. Block out time for yourself and treat it like any other important appointment. Whether it’s a quiet walk, a massage, an hour with a good book, or just some time to sit and do nothing—it’s a crucial part of your work-life balance.
Having “me time” isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity. It’s during these moments of calm that you can recharge and return to your responsibilities with renewed joy and energy. Consider adding this time to your daily or weekly schedule as non-negotiable—just like you would a work meeting.
- Practice Self-Compassion
We are often our own harshest critics. Professional women, in particular, tend to set impossibly high standards for themselves. When we don’t meet them, we feel guilt and shame, thinking we’re failing. But you are only human, and humans are imperfect.
Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend. Recognise that it’s okay to have bad days, to feel tired, or to fall short sometimes. Let go of the guilt that comes from not being able to do everything perfectly. You deserve grace and understanding, especially from yourself.
- Ask for Help
There’s a misconception that asking for help is a sign of weakness, but it’s actually a sign of strength. It shows you recognise your limits and are willing to take steps to ensure you don’t burn out. Whether it’s at work, at home, or with personal challenges, don’t be afraid to delegate or seek support.
At work, trust your team to take on more responsibilities. You may think that you can do it quicker and better, and you are probably right, but they may want the opportunity to learn and become as accomplished as you are. Share household tasks or childcare with your partner or outsource what you can. And if the emotional or mental load becomes too heavy, consider speaking to a coach or therapist. These professionals can help you process your thoughts and emotions, offering a safe space to reflect and reset. You will feel so much lighter when you are able to talk through all the things that are on your mind with somebody who is there for you and is listening without judgement.
The Ripple Effect
By prioritising yourself, you create a ripple effect that touches every aspect of your life. When you’re at your best, you’re able to show up more fully for your family, friends, and colleagues. You’ll notice that when you take time for yourself, everything else seems to flow more smoothly and you find your work-life balance.
The next time you feel like you’re being pulled in every direction, stop and check in with yourself. Ask, “What do I need right now to feel balanced and energised?” By prioritising your well-being, you’re making sure that you can continue to give your best—not just to others, but to yourself as well. So, the next time you find yourself reaching for that metaphorical oxygen mask, remember that you deserve to breathe first. Only then can you truly help others.
Wendela Elsen is an ICF certified coach and EFT practitioner. She helps professional women navigate draining life challenges to restore joy and fulfilment in work, family and social life. You can read more about her work on her website https://openrabbit.com
©Wendela Elsen, 2024, All rights reserved.